Why Broken Trust is Bad for Business
In this episode we are going to talk about trust in the workplace.
Spoiler alert: it’s a two way thing. This means employers need to trust their staff just as much as employees need to trust their boss for a healthy, productive working relationship.
We are going to look at how employers can build trust with their teams and wider workforce, and the benefits trust can add to your company, particularly around discussing and supporting mental health. We also look at the dangers of neglecting trust, and by proxy your teams’ wellbeing, and what you should do if you feel your staff are taking advantage.
Another spoiler alert: NOTHING!
Highlights:
(01:38) When employees don’t trust leaders
(06:24) It’s not your fault
(08:24) How to safely exit a company
(11:10) What to do if you don’t get help
(13:47) How to bring the best out of your employees
(16:00) When employees take advantage
(18:12) Hiding mental health issues
(20:10) How to build trust with employees
Take the Aurora 360 Quiz: How Effective Is Your Company's Wellbeing Strategy?
Connect with us here:
Website: aurorawellnessgroup.co.uk
LinkedIn: Ngozi
LinkedIn: Obehi
Book a Call here
Transcript
Welcome to the wellbeing, rebellion, the
Unknown:podcast that's changing workplace cultures for good.
Unknown:We're your hosts in Ghazi Wella,
Unknown:and obey telephoto.
Unknown:Let's get this rebellion started. We talked a lot about
Unknown:trust in the episode we did about how you foster
Unknown:psychological safety in the workplace. And it came up
Unknown:recently, when we attended the D TX conference in Manchester. And
Unknown:I was on the panel. And it was a panel on is workforce is
Unknown:workplace well being the key to a successful workforce in 2023.
Unknown:And it was a great panel was a wonderful event. I did not know
Unknown:the DGX. Manchester was the largest tech conference in in
Unknown:the north, I think. And it was phenomenal. And I was joined on
Unknown:stage by some incredible panelists, there were reps from
Unknown:and these are senior bigwigs from Kellogg's from infinity
Unknown:works and beauty Bay. And the topic was really relevant and
Unknown:the audience. Normally when you do these panels, audiences don't
Unknown:ask that many questions. But this time, the audience had a
Unknown:lot to talk about workforce wellbeing and whether it's the
Unknown:key to the success of the future of work. But one question that
Unknown:was really challenging, in fact, there were two. And they were
Unknown:from two different perspectives on the same topic. So we I
Unknown:thought we should talk about it was this thing about trust? And
Unknown:what happens when it breaks? Right? So the question was, for
Unknown:one person, what happens when employees don't trust their
Unknown:managers and leaders? And then someone else asked about, you
Unknown:know, what happens when employees take advantage of the
Unknown:organization's generosity in supporting them with their
Unknown:mental well being efforts and use it as an excuse to be lazy
Unknown:or work shy? So yeah, it was also about how do you go about
Unknown:rebuilding trust? So this trust issue is one that people
Unknown:understand now that they have to grapple with both individually
Unknown:and corporately? And so we thought it was something that
Unknown:was worth us talking about? Because at least answering
Unknown:the question, because, yeah, when you're on a panel, and
Unknown:people have questions to answer it, and then everybody, the
Unknown:panel would have to add bits and bobs. But it'd be nice to
Unknown:actually just almost like, respond fully. What we would
Unknown:normally have said, if we didn't have time restraint, that makes
Unknown:sense. So that was, so I think the first question that I wanted
Unknown:to, to answer
Unknown:is the personal one, about employees who have, who have
Unknown:experienced a breach of trust, who've been hurt. So I can't
Unknown:even break confidence because I don't know this person's name.
Unknown:She had worked for a previous company, had had suffered,
Unknown:having told her managers about her mental wellbeing concerns.
Unknown:And their response was much less than favorable. I don't know
Unknown:what the company was. We didn't know
Unknown:anything about that. But clearly it worked in tech. But the words
Unknown:he was asking, was that what do you do? What is how can you see
Unknown:an employee? What could you have done differently? Because her
Unknown:issue was I told them, what was going on with me? And they acted
Unknown:like they didn't believe me, I would lie. And what did that
Unknown:leave? Where did that leave her basically? So it can interesting
Unknown:to ponder, what did the employee do when that happened to them?
Unknown:Before the organization? What can you do when an employee
Unknown:who's either left or actually doesn't feel the contract the
Unknown:manager to your leaders to support them in their time of
Unknown:need? Okay, you could have two perspective, one for the
Unknown:employee himself, and two, for the organization. When you have
Unknown:employees like the saying that they're not happy, or they're
Unknown:not listening to openly by their leader and manager. What can you
Unknown:do about that?
Unknown:Okay, so for an employee, it's a very personal thing, first of
Unknown:all, to have the courage to say, I'm really struggling this thing
Unknown:is not easy. I know from firsthand experience, I wouldn't
Unknown:tell anybody at work because of the fear that they would say,
Unknown:well, that's just because you're crap, or that they wouldn't
Unknown:believe me, or that it'd be held against me all the things that
Unknown:we've talked about previous episodes that stop people from
Unknown:coming forward. I didn't tell a single soul. I just didn't show
Unknown:up for work when I got signed off. That's it. So the fact that
Unknown:if you come across An employee who has had the confidence, or
Unknown:is either that desperate courage, the courage Yeah, that
Unknown:they have been able to tell you, as a manager, that they're going
Unknown:through a difficulty, doesn't know what strength that took,
Unknown:it's very, very difficult if you if you do that if you take that
Unknown:deep personal risk, and then you're met with either apathy or
Unknown:even worse, a lack of belief, if that happens to you, certain
Unknown:things will happen. First of all, you will never risk
Unknown:exposing yourself like that to that individual or possibly even
Unknown:to anyone in that organization ever again. Because you have you
Unknown:as the manager has just proven that they're not safe to do so.
Unknown:And to, they then will likely not be able to get the help that
Unknown:they need. So the problem will exacerbate My advice to you if
Unknown:this is you going through this is, first of all well done, for
Unknown:telling someone as the kill kidsave for speaking your truth.
Unknown:Well done. And I am very sorry that you weren't met with the
Unknown:kind of grace and compassion that you should have been, or
Unknown:that you weren't given an effective avenue for support and
Unknown:help. It is not your fault. likely it is not your fault,
Unknown:right? So don't stop being brave. Just find someone who
Unknown:just deserves that courage. And if that's not in your workplace,
Unknown:find it outside,
Unknown:you know, other workloads. I think that's a good point there.
Unknown:Also, if it's not your actual manager, because I'd like to
Unknown:think if I'm, if I was speaking to her on the side, and two came
Unknown:up, it took me one on one on the side, I forgot what are say,
Unknown:your manager did not believe you what the next How do you
Unknown:escalate it, who's the next person that you could tell? It
Unknown:could be another manager from another department, it could be
Unknown:the money manager, it could be HR. So just a question of what
Unknown:are the procedures and for organization, you should have a
Unknown:procedures for this. If a manager is not doing what's
Unknown:required, what to can employ you do neck with the next person
Unknown:they can talk to, or who that person they can talk to, if
Unknown:they're not getting what they require. So that's one. And the
Unknown:second thing I would have been asking about access to her EAP
Unknown:she's access to mentors, you know what they are, and what
Unknown:offers to see, qualify for any of those things. I've been
Unknown:coding, let's go and check them out. And if t an encoding her to
Unknown:you them based on what you offer it, that do not be afraid to do
Unknown:is to consider external support lockdown or coat of dental
Unknown:therapy would depend on what's going on firm for them. So that
Unknown:they can think about you and only you know the word, you are
Unknown:the priority, you come first. So that way you have opportunity to
Unknown:think about what you need, what you need for your career, what
Unknown:lifestyle, you're looking for all of that stuff and makes it
Unknown:about you in a way that you may not have that confidence with
Unknown:your manager to discuss it. And clearly, if trust had been
Unknown:broken in this way where they don't believe you or think
Unknown:you're lying, I wouldn't be trying to encourage them to go
Unknown:back and talk to that manager about their future planning.
Unknown:That's not something I'd want to include. Because I don't want
Unknown:them to feel even more unsafe than the data we say, if a
Unknown:company no longer feels right for an individual, right? If
Unknown:you've not worked out, this is not the right place for me, I
Unknown:don't feel safe here, give or take whatever departments I'm
Unknown:going to be, then I'm going to encourage this person who asked
Unknown:me to figure out how she can safely exit from this
Unknown:organization, people get worse when they're not being supported
Unknown:at work, they feel less motivated. Dado is not helpful
Unknown:to her or the organization really. So it's in her best
Unknown:interest to figure out how you can safely exit from a company
Unknown:to somewhere else where she can be more herself and get lost in
Unknown:it. But what I will be encoding when that time comes for her to
Unknown:leave to be honest, and kind about why is she leaving during
Unknown:the exit interview. If they exit interviews, they should be if
Unknown:your organization don't have one, you should definitely have
Unknown:one for every employee who hides in there notice because that
Unknown:will give her opportunity to let the organization know the real
Unknown:reason why she left the support she had or didn't have any
Unknown:recommendation district to make them no longer her business
Unknown:anymore. But I wondered if she does that then say Oh, I got a
Unknown:different job. Different pay. I'm gonna be honest about what
Unknown:it was that contributed to it. Well, the key thing that I
Unknown:always say to Hey Charlie did I And I always said, people who
Unknown:have mental health issues or struggles, or whatever it is,
Unknown:and physical health issues, they will eventually get well, right?
Unknown:Eventually, they'll get well, they'll figure themselves out,
Unknown:they'll get treatment, whatever. But they will never forget how
Unknown:you treated them, how you supported them. And if you
Unknown:didn't support them appropriately, or well, they
Unknown:will actively look for a way to leave. Today already seen what
Unknown:you like, if other people have watched them go through this,
Unknown:what them struggle, what how their managers responded to
Unknown:them, they also know that it's not a place I can trust, either.
Unknown:And they will be seeking to leave. Because when people don't
Unknown:feel safe in their space, when they attend, they spend a lot of
Unknown:energy, trying to figure out how to get themselves safe with me
Unknown:constantly working their back all of that stuff. So that's
Unknown:what I wanted to, to wrap up that what I would have to say to
Unknown:an individual person who is struggling, we get this all the
Unknown:time. We're psychologist and coach. So therefore, I will have
Unknown:individual people asking for support because their HR isn't
Unknown:providing that for the organization. It's not providing
Unknown:that they could do exactly the strategy are we getting them to
Unknown:do? We wanted to share that with you all?
Unknown:Great. So that answers the individuals question about what
Unknown:do I do? Because they didn't help me the answer and summaries
Unknown:continue to get help pursue that because you deserve. You deserve
Unknown:to feel well continue to pursue all avenues available to you for
Unknown:help go up if you must go around if you can go external, but get
Unknown:the help. But then there's the point of view of the company,
Unknown:the company, what does a company do or an organization or a
Unknown:leader do if they feel that they're, they are providing that
Unknown:kind of level of support, the psychological safety, all of the
Unknown:things as it said, but their employees are taking the mick
Unknown:and are using their generosity as an excuse not to work or to
Unknown:shirk. Now, we get this question a lot less so nowadays, I must
Unknown:admit, but in the first few years, people would say but if
Unknown:you're doing this, if you're if you're always showing them that
Unknown:you care, and you're showing the soft side, then they'll just
Unknown:take the mick, which is a very old school approach is a very
Unknown:paternalistic approach to how you view the employer employee
Unknown:relationship. Yeah, but the truth is, as I said, always,
Unknown:always focus your attention where you're going to get the
Unknown:most reward. Why would you focus on the tiny fraction of people
Unknown:who may take advantage of your mental health support, which
Unknown:might be 1%? Even if it's 10%? Why would you take to focus on
Unknown:how you can stop that from happening when you should be
Unknown:focusing on the bigger prize, the vast majority of people who
Unknown:have mental health concerns, under report, they don't access
Unknown:help, they don't take time off work. Only a small number of
Unknown:people, a tiny fraction of healthy employees will use the
Unknown:mental health excuse to stop them from doing work. Right?
Unknown:You're not trying to manage the worst performance, you're
Unknown:focusing your efforts on how you can bring the best performance
Unknown:out of your employees. So if someone brings up their mental
Unknown:health issues and concerns, believe them, it is 99% more
Unknown:likely that they're going to be telling the truth and a lie.
Unknown:Don't assume that it's just an easy cop out. If you can assume
Unknown:that they are telling the truth because you've created that
Unknown:environment of psychological safety and trust. If you assume
Unknown:that they're telling the truth, you have a good relationship,
Unknown:then assume that if they tell you that they can't manage their
Unknown:performance because of their mental health struggles, that
Unknown:they're telling the truth, the two are not mutually exclusive,
Unknown:right? Then recognize that this is going to have an impact not
Unknown:just on them, but on the wider team. You're going to have to do
Unknown:something to manage it. You can't just do it. They're there
Unknown:as the show Have you have you thought about calling the EP,
Unknown:you're gonna have to make sure this person gets help as quickly
Unknown:and effectively as possible because whilst They are not at
Unknown:their best, they are going to be underperforming. And that's what
Unknown:we call them well being black hole, one person is affected.
Unknown:Everyone sees what your response is to that, it's generally to
Unknown:divide the workload amongst the remaining members of staff who
Unknown:are fully operational, it will, it will reduce their
Unknown:productivity. But if you also, another element of the well
Unknown:being black hole is, if you view the way you're treating this
Unknown:individual as something that's not private, between you and
Unknown:them, it's visible to everybody. Everybody's going to see how you
Unknown:respond to employ X, when they came to you with their problem,
Unknown:and decide whether or not they can truly, truly trust you with
Unknown:this. So make sure that you know that you're on show and what it
Unknown:whatever you do from that point onward, will either grow or
Unknown:erode the trust that you have between yourself and your
Unknown:employees
Unknown:will not get the unacknowledged. Exactly. To be fat. I'm going to
Unknown:be very honest, when I hear this question, we hear it a lot, who
Unknown:says what do you do when employees are taking advantage?
Unknown:I know for a fact that your managers have not been trained,
Unknown:I know that for a fact, I can almost set the clock on it. In
Unknown:other words, there is no way a fully transformational train
Unknown:manager would assume that if they did, because this person
Unknown:already had history of mid case, you're looking at about one
Unknown:content about one person or two people. When if you be concerned
Unknown:about the majority of people who do their work and want to do
Unknown:well. So they didn't want it to something comes up because they
Unknown:don't know how to train them. They assume that if someone even
Unknown:had mental health issue, that is an excuse to an opportunity to
Unknown:execute poor performance. It's not really it's possible to
Unknown:support somebody with mental health, at the same time
Unknown:performance manage them, because performance management isn't a
Unknown:punitive exercise, I think the idea we think it is. So this is
Unknown:why it's always clear to me, when managers say that the tools
Unknown:are going to take the player to because they think saying I'm
Unknown:not I got mental health issue and giving you carte blanche to
Unknown:not do your work or show up. That's not true at all. You can
Unknown:learn how to do boat, you can learn how to be empathetic to
Unknown:someone's mental health, make sure to get treatment, and make
Unknown:sure that you have at the manager agreed that scope of
Unknown:work that this person is going to be doing based on their work
Unknown:going on with them based on whether or not they're getting
Unknown:treatment or not getting treatment based on what they've
Unknown:agreed with the team and how the team is going to help out. This
Unknown:is very clear to me when someone said somebody taking the pill
Unknown:just for taking the pill state that they haven't been trained
Unknown:properly. So if you get I'd hate to get managers coming to you
Unknown:saying that, Oh my god, I think the people are ordered mental
Unknown:health issues causing issues. People are just not wanting to
Unknown:work. You know, you have a training problem. Indicator. You
Unknown:know what you think about that?
Unknown:Me and my damn ADHD I can't remember the really great point
Unknown:that you've you just made, which was you were saying that if
Unknown:people come to you saying that, Oh, yeah, all this mental health
Unknown:stuff is there they're taking the piss. One reason might be
Unknown:because people do often think like, I guess I am talking about
Unknown:the old school. They think well, you know, bloody out there was
Unknown:no mental health before now everybody's off sick. Sandra's
Unknown:obviously, that's the well being black hole. So even if they're
Unknown:saying, you know, it was one person on the team now it's 10.
Unknown:It's ridiculous. Oh my gosh, it might be because it's the well
Unknown:being black hole, which is, like I said, the impact the knock on
Unknown:impact of one person's illness or productive incapacity on
Unknown:everybody else, which increases their own stress levels. Or it
Unknown:might be because you're doing such a good job creating
Unknown:psychological safety, that people who are hiding it before
Unknown:are now able to speak up about the fact that they're
Unknown:struggling, and they need support. And it might be short
Unknown:term pain for a very, very much bigger long term gain. But yet
Unknown:people don't take the piss with telling you that they're going
Unknown:through mental ill health. And if you've created a truly open
Unknown:culture based on trust, based on mutual respect, based on an
Unknown:adult adult relationship, you'll know when they're taking the
Unknown:piss simple, but then how can you tell OB if your employees
Unknown:don't trust their leaders? So the people who are listening are
Unknown:good audience are in fact, in HR or in senior management? How do
Unknown:you know if you haven't got a good level of trust between your
Unknown:managers and their staff?
Unknown:Yeah, I'm gonna say first and it behavior so what are people
Unknown:doing? What are you seeing? I mean, we'll talk about country
Unknown:office now, right? So two, three days a week people are doing
Unknown:that. All of a sudden, people are often uncomfortable coming
Unknown:back into the office just started doing it. And finally
Unknown:suddenly or not, that might be one, the gossip by the
Unknown:watercooler what's happening when people say in when people
Unknown:go off sick, what? What is the? What are they saying about them
Unknown:after they've been sick, right? When to when they've been off
Unknown:sick for free to help your organization to send flowers and
Unknown:cart when someone's off for mental health care nothing, why
Unknown:the person come back and look like we had leprosy. That's why
Unknown:the left is the weirdest feeling. So those are the
Unknown:example your toes you we don't trust, you go out of the office
Unknown:and be ill for physical health, but not mental health is to what
Unknown:one in that. One thing I would say, if you also have complaint
Unknown:include complaint, so gone from like a case of that lady saying
Unknown:that the manager didn't believe her, then she might have got
Unknown:escalated it to HR to say, Listen, I've got this thing, and
Unknown:my manager wouldn't help. If you're getting more that more
Unknown:complaint of the same manager, maybe the same department that
Unknown:gives you an indicator as well. And also your surveys. So if you
Unknown:do post obeys, and frankly, to be fair, if your organization is
Unknown:one that it already, people want to audit trust issue, you may
Unknown:not get a clear picture if you send a survey, but at least the
Unknown:back and do nothing. So send a survey, make those anonymous,
Unknown:right? And ask very specific question about trust and whether
Unknown:or not I talked to my manager to support me, I can escalate
Unknown:things, if I have issues, I'm actively looking to leave the
Unknown:organization, Mike, you can ask very specific questions that
Unknown:anonymous could have people can tell you what you need to know.
Unknown:So that's kind of ideal in terms of behavioral or something that
Unknown:you're gonna have to see or hear. But I for what one is
Unknown:feeling inside, you can't possibly or less to ask them.
Unknown:So to round up, assume your employees are lying to you, when
Unknown:they say they need help. Assume you do need to continue to build
Unknown:on the psychological safety that exists within your teams and
Unknown:your organization. Because you genuinely always do assume that
Unknown:your managers need to continually learn how to be
Unknown:better people, managers in terms of creating and cultivating
Unknown:trust between their employees and, and assume that they don't
Unknown:just know this stuff by osmosis, but they need your support
Unknown:through training and education. If that trust is broken, it
Unknown:takes a long time to restore it, it's gonna take more walking the
Unknown:walk and talking the talk, right?
Unknown:Yeah, I think once the truck is broken in organization, it would
Unknown:have a knock on effect from things on lower engagement, high
Unknown:turnover, reduced innovation, it just so you have to be prepared
Unknown:to allow time for that to happen. Okay. And for one of the
Unknown:questions that actually we didn't talk about it, one with
Unknown:what happened when someone has come from a different
Unknown:organization. So they the last organization wasn't quite up to
Unknown:par, they didn't trust them to come into your organization
Unknown:having some level of lack of trust, because you're not sure
Unknown:like based on past experiences, which is why is it important
Unknown:when new people join your team, you need to be able to share
Unknown:with them about what you're doing, how you're helping to
Unknown:build trust, how they can come to who they can go to talk to
Unknown:about thing, just to help them to let them have that baggage
Unknown:that you might have come with from another organization to be
Unknown:able to let them know, let that get that light, load lighter. So
Unknown:that way, they can start to form relationship with a new team,
Unknown:new manager, and don't bring old baggage into a new organization.
Unknown:But that's the reason why we think it's important that worker
Unknown:safety because that account for new people joining your
Unknown:organizations or teams.
Unknown:To round off, I'm gonna end this episode with a quote, because
Unknown:everything we've talked about reminded me of my favorite
Unknown:American author Maya Angelou. And that famous quote that she
Unknown:had, I've learned that people will forget what you said,
Unknown:people will forget what you did. But people will never forget how
Unknown:you made them feel. loved that. Yeah, that's what it's about.
Unknown:All right. Thank you. We'll see you next time next time. Thanks
Unknown:for listening to this episode of The wellbeing rebellion.
Unknown:If you liked what you just heard, please share it with your
Unknown:colleagues. Follow us on LinkedIn. The link could be in
Unknown:the show notes and genuinely show us some love.
Unknown:We want to build a whole army of fellow rebels who want to create
Unknown:positive workplaces for everyone. Will you join the